Learning to live is more than just choosing not to die, as sixteen-year-old Ryan discovers in the year following his suicide attempt. Despite his mother’s anxious hovering and the rumors at school, he’s trying to forget the darkness from which he has escaped. But it doesn’t help that he’s still hiding guilty secrets, or that he longs for a girl who may not return his feelings. Then he befriends Nicki, who is using psychics to seek contact with her dead father. This unlikely friendship thaws Ryan to the point where he can face the worst in himself. He and Nicki confide in one another the things they never thought they’d tell anyone—but their confessions are trickier than they seem, and the fallout tests the bounds of friendship and forgiveness.
I had been wanting to read this book for YEARS now, and when I saw it at my local library I instantly checked it out. I read this book within one day; and unfortunately, I was a bit disappointed. I really thought this would be that kind of story that is so passionate, complex, and completely enthralls its readers. But I did not get this feeling what-so-ever.
It wasn't a bad book at all, it was just okay in my opinion. Ryan was a 17-year-old boy who is mostly a loner in school because of the stigma that follows him after most people discovered his attempt to commit suicide. Nicki is a vibrant 15-year-old girl who goes by the beat of her own drum with no regard for judgment from others.
The one interesting thing that I picked up from reading this book is the topic of suicide. Ryan wasn't the typical suicidal book boy that I intentionally expected. Yes, he was thoroughly messed up. Yes, he had psychological issues. But more than anything, he just wanted to connect with people - like we all internally want to do. And when he was constantly rejected of that desire is what caused his downward slope.
That would probably be the only concept that I really enjoyed exploring in this book. Everything else was just...eh.